Mazal Tov!! It's a boy...

Mazal Tov to my dear sister and brother in law, Bashie and Shua, Shluchim of the Rebbe to Harbor Beach, Florida on the birth of their wonderful little boy.

What a wonderful day.

I also thought of something else...
When a woman's water breaks while giving birth, it would be kedai for the husband and people around to say together: "Der Ba'al Shem Tov hot gezogt, az ven men bagegent vasser, zol men zogen as Mayim iz a siman Brocho!"
... On second thought, when the water breaks, that might be the last thing on the people's mind.

Whatever, as long as the Sha'a Tova comes soon for us...

NOT FOR SONIA'S EYES!!!

If you're Sonia, or any other married woman, please don't read this post. It's not meant for you.

...

I said stop!!!

...

So anyways, all men out there, I got some awesome news that I figured out today, which I thought I would share with you.

"On Fridays, if you go to the Israeli flower sellers that sell on the random corners (La'afuki the big flower section on Crown and Kingston), who own their own little flower businesses (La'afuki the Mexican guys with shopping cart flowers who work for someone else)... If it's late enough in the day, they will allow you to bargain with them. They own the place, so they make their own prices (usually a rip off in the mornings). They are desperate to sell, otherwise they need to wait until next week and all their flowers are garbage.

I went to Empire Kosher today and bought $15 flowers for $10... The guy seemed desperate to sell. Like he wanted to get home already.

...

Good Shabbos.

Parsha thought and others.

Missing Shalit. I don't even know him. But he's my brother. This video is really nice. It's also good to see a video of a singer singing on tune, as opposed to many of the small time singer of recent (and unfortunately, I must include our very own Benny Friedman. On his unofficial performing youtube clips, he's way off tune. It might be the quality of the video or it may be his voice, but it doesn't make him look very talented. I hate saying it, but it's true).

Anyways, on to bigger, better and more Chassidic things...

I read an article on Chabad.org, where the author writes about how Yaakov didn't bring up his family in Be'er Sheva, where they would have been enveloped in holiness and purity. Rather, when it came to bringing up his children like real good Jews, he brought them to the lowest of places. He travelled down to 'Charan', the 'charon af shel makom'... Only there, where he was challenged and squeezed to his capacity, did he raise a family of 12 rightous, holy children, who fathered the future nation of Israel.
The article goes on to say that when a person is comfortable and able to freely express himself without hardships, then he cannot access his essence. An olive cannot produce it's shining oil if it is not squeezed.
For this reason, if Yaakov were to live in Be'er Sheva, his children would have grown up in a comfortable environment. They would have been brought up in a Crown Heights. That would have made them nice, simple Jewish boys. But they wouldn't have been able to reach their full potential. They would have crumbled when they left their surroundings... For this reason, Yaakov travelled to Charan to make a family. He went into the firy pit to, to the eye of the storm, and only there, where he displayed absolute devotion and commitment to Hashem throughout all his sorrows and woes, did he merit to raise a family of 12 Tzaddikim.

The lesson I took was obvious. Living in Crown Heights has its benefits. It is easy to keep Kosher. It is easy to not watch television. It is easy to learn Torah and do Mitzvos.
But as soon as there is an iota of a exposure to the 'outside' Charan world, the person within the secure confines of his Crown Heights can crumble and succumb to the challenging, new environment around him. He can CH"V give up and drown in the waters of physicality and 'grohbkeit'.

Therefore, the answer seems to be, that we need to go out on Shlichus. We need to leave the comforts of home and go to where it is dangerous. Go to where we are challenged. Only there, will we be able to really affect the world and bring Moshiach.

The part which scared me, was thinking of all of this after I read it.
Yes, it sounds good. But if someone is not as strong as Yaakov, then he will easily give in to his surroundings when he is suddenly confronted by the Lavan's and the crooks of Charan.
Only a Yaakov, a man who has completely transformed his body from its coarse state and turned it into a sublime chariot of Hashem, only he can withstand the troubles of the foreign land and not be intimidated and sucked in.

How can we, or perhaps 'I', possibly be strong enough to go out on Shlichus and be ensured that my children will turn out to be like to 12 Shvatim?
The only answer is a two-fold answer.
First of all, if we're truly looking at our task as the Shlichus of the Rebbe and we are but axe's in the hands of the woodchopper, then all I need is Bittul and the Rebbe will do the rest. I need not look around and even give my surroundings legitimacy to be intimidated by them. I am but a channel of the Rebbe. I sit there and he does all the work.
On the other hand, I must also put in the effort to be the Yaakov. Even though I will never be a Tzaddik, I must always work to be rightous.
Mosai Yavo Midosai Kemidos Ha'avos?

And that's the thought.
I need to be strong on Shlichus. At the end of the day, as strong as I try and be, I will never be able to ensure absolute success with myself, my children and their Chinuch... Once I am doing my utmost to be the best I can, I also need to have the Emuna that the Rebbe will take care of the rest for me.

Good Shabbos

Zeidy joke:

As I said in a comment several days ago, I feel my mind rapidly developing into a Zeidy mentality. I think like a Zeidy.

So, I thought of this joke which is pertinent to this week's Parsha:

Rachel: Yaakov, did you dream of sheep or a ladder?
Yaakov: It was the latter.

I should be so ashamed of myself.

Other stuff and stuff.

So, Josh calls me up the other day and tells me a real interesting thought.
He was walking down the street and saw a man dressed in camouflage, with a bright, neon orange vest on top of the camouflage.
What an interesting way of dressing.

But, in Josh's ever Chassidish perspective on everything, he took a remarkable lesson in our Avoda's Hashem from it.

The lesson is, that a person must be clothed with spiritual camouflage. He needs to 'blend in' with his surroundings. He is not allowed to stand out and show off to the world "Ani Veafsi Od!"... Of such a person, Chassidus tells us, that Hashem says "there is not enough room for him and me to remain together." One must therefore be clothed in his camouflage, his clothing that will cause people to pass right on by and won't stop to inspect and admire his rightous ways.
On the other hand, there comes a time when one must show true "Ga'on Yaakov". Certain aspects of our lives must be clothed in absolute pride and big 'orange, neon vests'. Vests that stand out from the crowd, something that will turn people's heads. So that when people see a Chossid walking down the street, they happily exclaim "Wow! Look! That must be a Chabad Chossid walking!"

Such is the lesson of the camouflage with the orange vest.

...

If anyone knows a Bochur who would want to go to Cabo and take over the Chabad House for a few weeks, until I return. Please let me know asap.
The last guy fell through. It didn't end up working out and I am currently desperate to find someone to take over for awhile.
Help!

Last song. I'm on a roll.

Enjoy...

And after two hours of all this Shtus. I'm going to go and move on with my leben.

Ciao!

Rcording and posting is more fun than I thought.

Here is a song I made several years ago, after my beloved Zeidy, Yaakov Zimmel Dubrow passed away.

The lyrics are as follows:

Growing with you, still clear in my mind,
We'd go up to visit, spend time by your side.
With some chips and a soda, we'd sit on your knee,
You were our treasure, the greatest Zeidy.

The trail left behind you, when you would walk by,
no one could be sad, even if they'd try.
It was something about you - behind your radiant face,
Explosions of your love, in your kiss and embrace.

CHORUS:
Oh! Fly through the heaven's and spread out your wings
The people you've loved, with you now will sing.
But one thing's for sure, whatever I do,
My life have been changed forever by you.

The smile on your face and the laughter you gave.
To live life so happy, the values you paved.
By night and by day, always you give.
Zeidy please know, within me you live.

With Bubby beside you, wherever you'd go,
True love's definition, everyone would know.
You proved to a world that there's youth when you're old,
But it seems to be over, I'm so dark and cold

If only you’d give me, let me have once more.
That rush of excitement, as you walk through the door.
So sad to hear, that your time has come,
But deep down I know, that you've just begun.

Song for the Holtzbergs Yahrtzeit.

So, I think this song deserves its explanation.

Again, I don't compose music. When I'm inspired or overwhelmed with emotions, I try to just let my heart do some talking and I put it into the guitar and on paper. That's how I roll.

So anyways, a couple of weeks ago, while reflecting on this past year and the entire attack on the Holtzbergs and Lubavich in general. I became inspired with Chabad and the way they've (we've) handled such a traumatizing tragedy.

When it first happened, remember how the entire Jewish world looked toward Chabad, wondering how we would react to the threat of every Chabad house, that had just turned into a deadly reality. "

Everyone thought that we would be intimidated to grow. Chabad will probably reconsider their entire strategy and the danger that the Shluchim put themselves into. They might close down those Chabad houses that seem more vulnerable to terror. They probably will stall their growth until things settle down.

But this past year has shown that nothing has changed. Chabad, in their strengthened commitment and perseverance have grown and grown and grown in spite of a sensible reaction.

We have defied nature. We will continue to defy nature. That is doch our nature.

...

Here are the lyrics to the song:

I remember my sobs, bitter tears on that day
Two dedicated holy Neshamos, cruelly taken away
And the questions they were asking, will we disappear
But yet we stand even stronger after one whole year

Is it magic, maybe luck or coincidence I see?
Can the scarred and axed up big old stump grow into a splendid tree?
But so many acts of goodness in your memory have begun
It can only be your shepherd who gives you strength to power on

So let the burning fires burn and the raging waters rage
Yeah to shine it’s now our turn, it’s our time to turn the page
With our Rebbe in the lead, there’s no doubt that we’ll succeed
Keep on shining… Shluchim changing the world.

Is the sacrifice enough to tear the heavens to the core?
Does the simple serving soldier question what you did this for?
With his marching orders given, and the vision he has shown
With faith you follow his command, so quickly you have grown.

One more Mitzvah’s all it takes and this Golus will finally end
Just one more push if kindness, we’ll see the Shechina shine again
With your superhuman surge of good, loving every single Jew
We will all be reunited, Gabi and Rivka too...

To 'ALL' of you who donated money for my recording.

I was kidding.

I will not take someone's money to record my own personal "Taiveh"

But it was real nice gesture.

... And yes, someone actually sent me their credit card information for $100. Surprising.

Instead, I think I will record the song on video and post it to my blog. Soon maybe.

The latest of my recordings.

So during the Kinus, Shimmy Weinbaum comes up to me and asked me to record this Niggun and Podo VeSholoim for some sort of kids Niggun challenge for Tzivos Hashem.
I went to the studio thinking that it would be a 20 minute job and then I'm outa' there.
We stayed for like three hours and did both songs. Some of the guys there had incredible voices and wonderful musical talents. I was very impressed and had a really good time doing it.

In the meantime, I've put together a song for the Yahrtzeit of Gabi and Rivky, but I don't have the means to record it. I need someone to sponsor me recording the song in Choni's studio. Anyone want to get me 100$?? hehe.

Enjoy this one.

Get this widget | Track details | eSnips Social DNA

And it's time for the weekly post.

Gave Kovi a bubble bath. He was scared in the beginning, but got used to it.

In front of Nosh world, we spent some time with Leibeleh and his cute kids.

Tatty walking with son. Isn't he cute? The lion on his back is his leash. We used it for the Subway ride to Manhattan yesterday.

Tatty and son posing.

Kovi is getting along with his cousins.

Mendy Rodal is sooooo cute. KA"H

Berele and Kovi, who loves rides ever since he learned how to say 'Car'.

The Kinus dancing from my lens. Not a special picture. But it's mine!

My first impression, walking into the main Kinus hall. Unbelievable.

KOvi in Montreal. This by far was his favorite toy. The reason? It has wheels and turns.

The security outside the Kinus. Cute.

I left the Mikva on Sunday morning and was walking towards the Kinus picture. I snapped this.

I know that I have a picture somewhere at home in Cabo of myself playing on the exact same piano in Montreal. About 23 years ago. I think I look almost exactly the same, except that I am wearing overalls, have some wacko headband on my head, longer hair, I look more spaced out and I think I even have chocolate on my mouth. I don't know why.

I will find the picture when I get back home and I will post it.

Kovi and Chaim Shimshon Hershcovich. They were awesome together.

Sitting and watching Malkalee together in Montreal.

My mother in law made this chef's hat with "Benny and Sonia" sewn into it. It's so cute. I already put it to good use.

...

Every week, upon my Chesbon Hanefesh, I realize two important things.

I realize that...

1. I've barely blogged the entire week.
2. I haven't done a proper Cheshbon Hanefesh in ages.

The kinnus was amazing. I am inspired beyond words, but it's such a shame that I won't be able to be back with my community for another few weeks. If only I would jump on a plane the day after the Kinus, who knows how fast Moshiach would have been here.

Spending Shabbos in Queens again. It is so wonderful to spend Shabbos over there. Although in a way, yes, we are going out of Crown Heights. But it's great to have Shabbos such a breeze and spend it with such an awesome family (Avremy, you reading this? hehe).

Aaight, need some sleep tonight, so that I can actually get things done maniana.

Good Shabbos and mucho love to all the hearty bloggers out there.

We will not forget about you. We will never ever forget about you'ou'ou

Go to the 11 minute mark and watch. I love this man. Simple. Pure. Holy. Real. Awesome. Cool. Inspiring.

Oy! Moshe Nunez.

Post note: You also MUST watch the incredible story Rabbi Nachman Holtzberg says. Go to 32:38 minute point and watch. Unreal.

Lesson from the Kinus picture

Nowadays, the Shluchim seem to be complaining that the Shluchim picture is so cheesy. All the 'big' guys end up being the only people seen in the photo, while all the other regular Shluchim cannot be seen at all. It's just too big a crowd. *

So I was thinking about that and something struck me.

When you look at the Shluchim pictures from the past few years, all the Shluchim look like are small pixels. It is true that you can barely make out their individual faces and complexions.
However, as small as they may seem in the picture, they each are changing worlds.

Although they may seem so insignificant and are but a black dot on the photo paper, they are changing the entire world and literally affecting the future of the Jewish people.
Amazing how a small 'nobody' can affect such change.

Yes we can.

* The photo above is from the 2007 Kinus. This year's must be much bigger.

And as a closing note: I am in the midst of learning (the hard way) that when there is no other food in the house to eat, it is better to go about hungry, then to nibble and munch on an entire package of dried apricots by the computer.

Family pictures...

I made it.

Check out these other pictures of my brothers on collive.com.

I have lots to say about the Kinus... But my day today is full and I woke up late.

2 cool points.

1 - Having wireless and a laptop is so cool. It means you can surf the internet while in the bathroom... It takes playing sudoku to an entirely new level.
Not implying that I did anything like that. It's just a thought. Let's leave it at that.

2 - I noticed that if you type in www.collive.org and not .com, it takes you to crownheights.info.
How's that for the Chabad website wars?

The comment rebuttal:

I'm sorry for this.
I wrote a post before and my dear brother Zvi commented on it. I feel like I haven't been clear enough with the post.

Allow me to explain...

Zvi commented:
Benny, you make some very good points, but I disagree somewhat.
You are making some assumptions that may not be true, and it seems to be a bit of Chabad propaganda.
Their complaint (which was invalid as you pointed out) probably also bordered around the fact that these Rabbis were JUST RABBIS DOING THEIR JOBS, while the others went above and beyond.
What I mean is that to an outsider: he is just a Rabbi, what did he do so special?
I'm sure that these guys didn't get voted in just for the fact that they started a 'dating website', otherwise you'd have to add the other 15 people who made successful dating websites.
I'm sure there's more to it and they've helped out many other people in other ways.
It's unfair to assume they ONLY did what they were nonminated for, while the Chabadniks did EVERYTHING.
This aside from the fact that for example the guy who started the youth group probably went through his fair share of problems you mentioned.
And there are plenty of shluchim who get something out of what they do.
You think Devorah Benjamin for some reason doesn't feel great for doing what she does? she is, in my opinion, the one who deserves it the MOST.
But maybe these other people touch as many lives as she does too...

I write:
Zvi, kindly allow me to present my rebuttal to your comments.
You say that I am giving Chabad propaganda. I in no way intend to publicize this post of mine. It shall forever remain on this blog and I will be the first one to tell you that I am being biased to Chabad. That being, since I myself am from a Chabad family. I think I deserve the entitlement to be biased for my brothers. As far as making factual statements and publicizing them to the world, I would probably be more careful and more 'open minded' and soft on my statements if I were ever to.
My assumptions may or may not be true. That is true. It's very general. Not in any way factually based. It's my personal opinion and emotion making those statements. But I do believe that they are statistically close to true. Maybe not accurate, but close.
...
You are right that the WORLD may assume that these Shluchim are Rabbi's just doing their job. Which is why I am asking "why the world doesn't know the true job, background and mission of the Shliach"
Regular Rabbi's give speeches on Shabbos and run funerals Zvi. They don't twist and turn at night, because someone from their community is having a problem with their children, family or business.
These Shluchim are far from being 'just Rabbi's'... The world thinks they are that. But the world is wrong...
...
The way the voting worked was, that anybody can nominate anybody else, as long as there was a legitimate reason for them being nominated. Then, the nominated hero needed to get votes.
Anyone who began a dating website could have been nominated just for that. Some dating website fans bothered to apply for the nomination of their hero and others didn't. But yes, they could have been nominated for nothing else other than starting a dating website. Look at the nomination video's. I don't see anything else that suggests that they've done more than that.
And I'm sure that they're wonderful, kindhearted people who deserve to be considered hero's in their own right.
...
You are right when you say that I diffrentiate between Chabad and non-Chabad. That I look at the specifics of the non-Lubavichers and I define each Lubavicher as a very general, all encompassing hero.
But, in my defense, I am not talking about practical action that makes them a hero. I am talking about the emotional approach to their work.
The non-chabad guy is good at web design, so he works in that and does good work. But he would never commit to making a youth program... Because he's not good at it. He can't do it.
The Chabad guy on the other hand will prefer a computer job if he's good at computers. But if he were to be assigned to deal with children, then he wouldn't refuse the job based on his own rationale. The Shliach does his job (or should do his job) whether it makes sense to him or not. Whether he's good at it or not.
If the Rebbe would have told Rabbi Cunin to work in a bakery, would Cunin have said "no thanks Rebbe, I'm good at opening 100+ Chabad houses in Cali, I'd rather stay there and not move to the bakery where I know nothing about the work"?
He would never have said that. Because he is a simple soldier of the Rebbe. So yes, even though he may be only in the 'opening Chabad Houses' branch of our tremendous movemenet. I still analyze him generally. Because he would do anything, ANYTHING that would be demanded on him from his and our Rebbe. I hope the difference is clear.
...
And finally, I also thought of the problems that these people may have gone through while opening and launching their programs.
But on the same note, Bill Gates must've also gone through his share of problems before he boomed with Microsoft.
Lev Leviev came from nothing. He must have had moments when he wanted to quit. But you wouldn't call him a hero for not giving up on his business. He considered his problems as part of his investment. If these people truly saw that their job was going nowhere for them, then they would quit. But they saw the future. They saw the long term successes.
A person who follows his own passions and goals will ultimately change as his environment and surroundings change.
One day, this guy might get bored of youth programs and so he'll drop it and go on to another of his passions. It was a great time doing what he loved, but now he's grown out of it. He's burned out from the youth programs and now he wants to learn how to fly planes perhaps.

- Isn't it interesting that the Kinnus Hashluchim is probably one of the only conferences that has an entire session dealing with burnout. Shluchim who are working on Shlichus for so many years, that they feel burned out and just want to quit. It helps them deal with the issue and become excited and motivated again.
Any other company or organization would probably reassign someone to the job, or the guy would retire or quit and move onto something that clicks more with him. But Shlichus is a commitment for life and the Shluchim deal with it beautifully. -

The Shliach doesn't follow his own pleasures and hobbies. The Shliach follows a goal that was set by Torah and put into motion by the Rebbe. And for that, there is no change.
The difference is, by non-Chabad, they will continue their work, only if they feel good about it... If there's something in it for them.
Chabad will do their work whether they feel good, whether they feel like garbage, whether they feel successful or whether they feel like absolute failures.
Like I said in the beginning - Don't look at the practical. Look at the entire emotional and psychological approach to the task.
Like the difference between a real parent and a foster parent. They're both doing the exact same thing on the surface. But where lies the difference? Who is the real deal? When the child is rebelling, getting into all kinds of trouble and his future looks grim, who takes responsibility and will not sleep at night until the issue is resolved?

So yes, Rabbi Lipsker in Miami and Rabbi Lazar in Russia might feel good about their work. They may have lots of money and power to inspire and encourage them. But take away everything they have and see if they give up, or if they will stick it through only because they are Shluchim. Not for the future investment and fame they might build up again.

btw, about Devora Benjamin... I think that people (Any people) who work with charities - Chabad or not - are much more refined and much more of heroes than the dating website and youth program organizers. They still feel good when they give Tzedaka. Heck! I feel good when I give Tzedaka... But it's very holy and precious.
Devorah Benjamin definitely deserves to be in the top.

Sorry for this long comment. I felt that I hadn't been clear enough in the post.

*I'm also not speaking of Shluchim in general. Every Shliach has their own personal issues and problems to deal with.
Sometimes, Shluchim are given challenges that don't challenge them personally, but they may challenge the whole position and communal issue of their Shlichus and where they find themselves. Obviously, these cases are few and far between. When they happen... it's a whole different story.

I'm also not in any way trying to imply that my being on Shlichus means that I am a hero. I wish I had the feelings and devotion that most other Shluchim have to their Shlichus.
In this, and last post, I was speaking purely hypothetically and how 'it should be'.

L`chaim!

And one last thing.

Ta'amu Ure'u is indeed an amazing CD.

I can't stop listening to it.
The voice on the cd is absolutely golden sweet.

Kol Hakavod.

The songs are equally as passionate and meaningful.

My insanity is back! My insanity is back! My insa...

Gosh!
I wish I would be able to remember all the things that I thought about tonight. So many things. I had so much to write on this blog. But alas, sometimes just too much passes through my little chickpea of a brain, and I am unable to store and back up all that information for later processing into this blog. Perhaps I should get some sort of human MOZY backup program. Whatever... Whatever again... And finally, whatever.
...
While in New York, my Shlichus is a challenge. It is so easy to live here (technically) and so difficult to live there. My mind is constantly bombarded with questions and doubts.
When I am involved in the Shlichus work in Cabo, I don't have time to question and think. I am too busy doing. It seems like having too much time on my hands here in Crown Heights is not a good idea and is destroying my Shlichus mentality that I've gotten used to until now.

Anyways, I've been thinking for most of the night (quite literally) about this and need to put it down on paper (or screen) to figure it out once and for all.



This video and the whole idea has had some sort of an impression on me. When I say impression, I mean that it actually got me to thinking. Thinking and analyzing the entire concept of nominating heroes.

Let's start from the beginning.

What is a hero?
What do superman, the NYFD from 9/11 and these nominated 'heroes' have in common that put them all into the same category?

The answer is not that they can do extraordinary things like lifting buildings, saving lives... The answer is deeper, more emotional.
The reason they are heroes is because they have invested and dedicated their lives for others.
Superman cares about the needs of any human being in distress. He saves them from danger.
The firemen from 9/11 - and all firemen and police for that matter - put their lives on the line each and every day for the well being of their fellow beings.
All the nominated heroes have given of themselves for a cause to better this world and the people living in it.

Yet, the more I thought about it, the clearer it became.

Within the framework of heroism, there is a big difference between these people.
In fact, when the picture loses it's fuzziness and blur, another question arises.

You see, I've read an article about the Jewish heroes who were recently nominated, organized by the federation.
The article mentioned the fact that 11 or something of the top 20 finalists were Lubavichers. They didn't like that. They claimed that Lubavich had advertised and gotten every member of their sect to vote daily, which is tweaking the system and making themselves win. They were undermining the heroism of these Shluchim and blaming their successful nominations on a glitch in the voting system... The fact that people were able to vote every day and Lubavich was capitalizing on their ability to email every Chabad Shliach and have 4000 people vote daily... Something to that tune was their claim.
While the entire basis and theory of this article is silliness, because the article itself praises the wonderful work of the other 'non Lubavich' nominations, who used the exact same techniques to promote themselves (mass emails asking their fans to vote daily for them).
But more than that. My question is, how dare they undermine the incredible work of the Shluchim and, more importantly, how can it be that more Shluchim weren't nominated!!??

You see, a person who dedicates his life to a cause usually has good reason to do it.

Let us put forth several examples of people who want to do more for their community and would be nominate'able for this 'hero' title...

- I want to begin a foundation to help people who are poor.
- I want to begin a youth program, helping youth get together and support each other.
- I want to start an online dating website.

All these are wonderful and helpful things to do for the community. But they also come with self benefit.

- The person who wishes to help people who are poor... He feels guilty inside if he doesn't. He feels good when someone thanks him for his generosity and help. It motivates him to begin publicizing his interest and he throws himself into his cause. He actually helps people. He is a true hero.
- The person who begins the youth program... He enjoys organizing programs for people and he's also great with teenagers. In fact, he's probably figured out that he's pretty good at organizing and dealing with teenagers. Over the years, many people have told him that this is his forte, so he's decided to make it a lifelong goal of his to helping people. Wow! He is a great person who gives of himself and he is most definitely a hero.
- The person who begins an online dating website... He's always been good at web design and he's seen that his friends have had problems dating, so he found a solution and he gives his talent to the world. He feels good to help people and see the success of his work. He is a hero, giving of himself to the cause.

All heroes, yet all of these (and other examples), on a very subtle and refined level are self centered.

Isn't it interesting that to be a hero, to be great, you need to be less egotistical and more giving. Which means to say, that the more you give of yourself, the less you are for yourself and only then, the more of a hero you become!

Ask yourself this;
- If the man who started the foundation for the poor got no thanks or recognition for his work. If he saw absolutely no gain whatsoever from his project, would he continue?
- If the youth director had 2 kids show up to his program and they didn't like his personality, so they left and money wasn't coming in. He was struggling and his effort wasn't paying off with the reward he expected, would he continue his programs?
- If the website designer saw no traffic to his site and nobody appreciated what he did. If he made no money back from the site, would he continue investing his time and effort into the project?

The answer is probably not. All these people would most probably shut down their projects and pursue them somewhere else, or go into another, more successful field. They'd given a nice shot to help out, but nobody appreciated their work. There was no gain for them whatsoever, so they shut down and got out.

These people are heroes, but they have something coming for them.

Consider the Shluchim around the world, who are fighting a fight... But it's not their own fight. It's the fight of their leader and Rebbe, promising them a world that is blissful and perfect, shining with G-dliness and holiness.
Perhaps they suffer daily from their hard work.
Perhaps they don't even believe one hundred percent in the certainty of their mission and its success. (Chances are that they do believe... But it doesn't matter to them.)
Perhaps they themselves really wanted to have other jobs and goals in life.
They are not necessarily talented in any particular field.
Some of them never learned English.
Some of them never learned organizational skills.
Some of them never learned web design.
Some of them never learned how to properly deal with children.
Some of them never learned how to use technology.

Yet, because they have a mission and goal at hand, they do what is needed.
Why? Because that's what needed. Very simple. That's what will bring Moshiach.

(Yes, Shluchim who are naturally good with kids will usually work with kids in their Shlichus. Shluchim who are good with computers, will usually follow the technical, computer connected parts of Shlichus. But that's not why they're involved. If the child friendly person would be commanded to go work with the computers, he would go without question. It's his approach to the task he is given that I am speaking about)

They don't care if there is money involved or not.
They don't care if there is a nice house coming or not.
They don't care if they will be nominated as a hero on a Jewish website or not.

They care that there is another Jew who does not know about Shabbos.
They care that there is another Jew who is sitting in prison and needs physical and emotional support.
They care that the world needs more goodness and kindness to bring Moshiach.
They care that Moshiach isn't yet here.

These are absolute heroes. Nothing for themselves. All for the cause. All for their Shlichus. All for the Rebbe.

So now I ask, why weren't there 3000+ Shluchim nominated for the Jewish hero award (and Devora Benjamin)?

...

And on a separate, slightly connected note:

Who am I? ... I know, I know! But who am I really? ... Isn't that a scary question? Many people ask that question of themselves. The people that get to answer that question, have missed the whole point!
You see, the question itself is the answer. As soon as someone can answer that question, as soon as someone can define and put his existence into perspective, he has lost who he truly is.

Is he a rich man? - Is he a smart person? - Is he talented? - Is he a great guy? - Is he funny? Is he a hero?

If he thinks he is anything, then he is truly nothing.
G-d created us, and our existence is nothing more than a simple and pure question; "Who am I?"

Yechi or not Yechi. That is the question.

Started the new job in Crown Heights and it goes very, very slowly. Mostly, because I'm trying to contact other people who are busy with their own lives and I can't move forward with the project until I speak with them... Oysh!

Michael Bloomberg is the new Mayor of New York and I don't know why everyone is upset at him. I'm not trying to be controversial at all. I really don't know anything about New York politics. I also don't care much about New York politics, so I don't understand why everyone gets so frustrated about these things.
Obama on the other hand, is an exciting issue to discuss.

In other news, I am in Crown Heights and bored. Trying to fundraise, but things are not going to well.
It takes loads and loads of guts to pick up the phone and ask someone to help support a cause that you are dedicating your life to.
The funniest part about it, is that when I'm lying in bed and fundraising seems to be but a distant, hypothetical dream, then the notion of asking someone to donate money to Chabad seems so simple and non-dramatic. I feel so comfortable with going out and fundraising. But that feelings instantly disappears when I actually pick up the phone and decide to make the phone call. All of a sudden, these thoughts of rich men cursing me under their breath and dreading my friendship start floating through my mind and I become terrified of making the phone call.

I am fundraisingly schizophrenic.

Oy!

Bored as Dying polar bears waiting...

I'm bored at home. Not much more to do.

I must say, I was very hyped about Beny Friedmans new upcoming cd release which, by the way, just came out in stores and download today.

So I was watching his video promo, and I decided to do a slight personal analysis of it.

I find several interesting stuph with it.

I will go through different portions of the video promo and point out my likes, dislikes and comments.



0:30 seconds in, I find it weird but cool. Benny Friedman is giving advice on something. I don't think anybody whatsoever can figure out what the heck he is saying. We need to be true to the art... We need to make music that we like... We can't fool ourselves?? I don't get it. It sounds abstract and inteligent. But I don't get it. That's all.
He seems to be upset about something when he says his 'advice', but I guess nobody will ever know for sure what exactly that has to do with the video. If anything, I don't like it. It doesn't fit in with the whole video.
This trailer seems to want to make Benny look like a normal, fun spirited and kindhearted guy. But with this slight ticked off expression on the video, I noticed it and don't think it should have been put in.

0:46 seconds in, there begins a clip of Benny sitting in the studio with two other guys. The one in the back is reading from a small, very thick book. I don't think there is any other book in the world that has the same dimensions as the Chita's. I thus conclude that the guy is reading Chita's and, judging by the pages he is on, he is either reading Hayom Yom (way at the back), or he's Davvening (I would guess Mincha or Maariv). He's even Shukling. That makes me proud of this video.

0:56 seconds in and 0:59 seconds in, there is a clip of cars on the highway and people bustling around Times square. Why?

1:13, the video shows him going off tune in the studio. I love that part. It shows that Benny is human. I really like the way the video portrays him as a very normal person. Not like the superstar, perfect performer that other - half decent - singers try to show of themselves. Obviously, they keep in the part where the studio technician compliments him and tells him that he needs to keep that flavor. It still makes him look good. And rightfully so.

1:20, I like the Ta`amu ure`u piece. It`s Chassidish. But I`m not so sure the words are `farzucht vet ir zehn`... I think it should be `farzuch`. Also, the camera should have taken another angle. The sun is on both sides of him and you can see a shadow on his face. I`m not sure if it`s the camera or some leaves that are making the shadow.

1:47, again you have him preaching about something. I`m not sure what it is that is upsetting him and driving him to give his Mussar to the camera and its viewers.

1:50 is just wrong. They could have skipped that part out, instead of making these two `clueless`Chasseedish Buchrim look like absolute idiots (major minor chord)... Why ruin the potential Shidduchim of two possible fans of Benny`sÉ
But I like the way he begins singing on the same note as the actual song, which the video fades into at 1:57.

2:07 and again at 2:12... Putting Yaron Gershovsky in there is always a winner with the Jewish crowd. For most Jewish music fans, he is the greatest pianist that ever lived. It`s as if the king of piano himself is endorsing Benny as a legitimate singer.

2:12... Practicing in front of an empty chair. Cool.

2:24 they show one of the two Chasseedishe Buchrim from before, who seemed to be mocking Benny at 1:50 of the video looking intently at admiringly at Benny, as if he`s impressed them with his `golden`voice. Perhaps he had. Nice little Shtik there.

2:28 is cool. First of all, it shows Kingston Ave Station there. It also shows Benny and his cousin Bentzy having a good time. I like it. It`s camp style. It`s not `higher than thou` spirit. He`s a fun guy for all. That the station is empty behind Bentzy Marcus at 2:36 is something that would have been cooler if there would have been in innocent bystander watching and smiling. It would have done a much better effect.

3:04 he is seen taking voice lessons and not being able to hit the correct pitch. I like it. Again, it shows him as a human being `who knows how to sing better than all of us`.
I`m not sure who the voice teacher is, but my guess is that he`s another one of those top end voice trainers and putting him on the video makes Benny join the ranks of the big league singers. People who know music would be impressed to see Benny taking voice lessons with such a trainer... Even though, I myself don`t know who this guy is.

3:08. While he`s taking voice lessons, someone is sitting on the armchair in the background and a girl is on the floor on a laptop. HuhÉ

3:17 is awesome. Benny is singing some very major and melodic piece with the words `Lishmor Velasos` and two busses pass by behind him going in opposite directions. I don`t know if that was planned, but it`s beautiful. It adds to the openness and colorfulness of the melody.

3:50. Again, the scene with the cars driving at night. I guess it`s just to waste time on the video and make it look cool. Though I don`t think there is any connection whatsoever.

4:10 the video goes from the CD`s version of `Bo yavo` to a wedding performance of the same song. It gets me nervous, because he`s singing both songs on different notes. The merge into the wedding performance is okay. But I wanted to hear more of the recorded version. It`s a good song. Oh well, I will need to buy the cd to hear the rest I guess.

And finally...

4:15. The famous controversy found on all Lubavich news sites that covered this album`s release. Benny walking in the middle of Eastern Parkway... I don`t care for it much. I think it`s cool. But if he really wants to send a message to the children in Crown Heights and other neighborhoods for that matter, Eastern parkway wasn`t the best decision for a cover.
But it`s cool still...

So there is my detailed critique of this video. And now I listen to the new CD.

Life update in the Heights.

I find that my life here in Crown Heights is mostly uneventful.

I think I predicted and anticipated this life before I even came. I figured that coming to New York would be only to wait. Wait for the goodness to come and then work on getting back to Shlichus. I figured that while I am waiting, may as well treat this all as some prolonged vacation. Enjoy it! Sleep in! Do nothing all day!

After a week or so, things are catching up to me and beginning to tap me on the shouler more frequently and more persistently.

I feel like I'm doing nothing here in CH and for a Shliach to feel that way is most certainly not a good sign. I need to pull my life together and make sure that I don't become lazy and stop correcting this troubled world from the insanity that encompasses within it. I need to continue my Shlichus from here. Yes, even from the confined of CH in Brooklyn, New York.

So the first thing I needed to do was get a job or get something to make sure that I stay occupied with good things in life.

After reading a very intersante post from my brothers blog about going to Mikva and having Brochos rain upon me, I decided to begin going to Mikva. While I was in Cabo, I've gotten comfortable with not going to Mik daily or even weekly (yes, I'll admit it). I guess I brought much of my Cabo Shtik with me back to the States.

So I made the decision to begin going again. Lo and behold, I did try it, and it works.

On the day that I went to the Mikva, I got three job opportunities. Can you believe it? three!!

The second one was something that's not for me, especially since I'm only here for a month or so.
The third one was also not for me, since it entailed me going into Montreal for Shabbos and I already had changed my Shabbos plans to stay in NY, due to a sick Kovi and an appointment for the Vaib... So I had to turn that one down as well.

But the first one was nice. I called the Shluchim office and asked if they had any jobs available for a young Ba'al Habos/Shliach who was in town for the month. They told me to come into their office and talk. Ooooooh! Come in and talk.
I came in and talked and it ended up, that I was given the job of beginning a new program that they want to launch from their online school.
I shouldn't really publicize this too much, because until it's off the ground, it's sort of like an Anihora to speak about it I guess. I hope it works out and turns out to be a success.

We will find out in due time. In due time sir.

... We also spent Shabbos in Queens again. Reizy had her birthday Kiddush and we were invited. It was nice again. Our second Shabbos in a row that we went to Queens.

I must say, the Chabad House in Queens has grown tremendously since we were last there. Lots of new people and such an amazing atmosphere goes on there. I hope the place grows and grows. It's so nice to see a place become too small to fit everyone that wants to be a part of it... I suddenly realize that I'm praising this Chabad House for two reasons... One is that I actually think it's an amazing Chabad House and the second one is because I found out recently that my bro in law, Reb Avremi checks this blog out as well... Call it sucking up, call it being nice, call it an investment in some future favor that I may need to ask of him. I haven't even figured out why I have truly decided to post this and more importantly, why I haven't consciously, or even impulsively held down on the backspace key and deleted all of this foolishness.
Whatever it is, I mean what I say. After all, what would a blog be worth if I wasn't a thousand percent honest with it.

tabloids and Media are liars (except foxnews perhaps). Blogs are not for liars or exaggerators. Blogs are the same numerical value as truth.

I wonder if there is some Goyishe Preacher who gets up in front of his congregation and says something like "Ladies and Gentlemen, Halloween has come. Halloween has gone. Are we different from it? Have we become better people from it? Did we make any good Hachlotes from it?"

Halloween is not only a vain holiday. But it's a negative and destructive one. I find it hard to understand how parents can still allow their kids to celebrate such holidays. I know there is fun to it and all, but shouldn't fun things be throwing frizbee's in the park, or sitting around and playing tiddly-winks together (I'm not sure myself what tiddly-winks is. My father used to play them as a kid and I think they like an amazing 18th century game).

I'm also tired.

And so, while I get ready to bid everyone a good night, I would also like to give a shout out to one of the many male friends of mine who is in the midst of finding his second half, life partner. May it all go well and we should hear good news very very soon.

Oh! I almost forgot, there is this dude in Queens Chabad House who said something so funny tonight. He walks into Shul for Mincha Mariv and exclaims "We want Cholent! We don't want to wait!"

I laughed out loud, to myself... But an inside out loud sort of.

G-nite