Any human being with the slightest appreciation for humor must watch this!!!

See more funny videos and Funny Videos at Today's Big Thing.

Shkoyach to Shua for sending this to me. It's so funny!!

Quick moment to remember

Let Shabbos, 28 Sivan, 5769 - June 20 2009 be a day that I will never forget.

Kovi started walking this afternoon and my heart melted (consequently, my heart is now on the second shelf of the fridge, trying to congeal it up a bit before I put it back in my chest).

In 8 hours, I will be on a plane headed to 28 degrees Celsius Montreal. It will feel freezing to me. Me, who's been sweltering under 107 Fahrenheit weather (mid 40's) for the past three weeks.
Yes, summer is coming and people tell me that I haven't seen nothin' yet. It's supposed to get only hotter. Yay!

We looked at the forecast and see that it's supposed to rain and be cloudy this week. Hooray! We are excited.
We haven't seen clouds or rain in who knows how long.

Oy! The pains of Shlichus.
While I wait to see rain 'pitter pattering' outside the window, Sonia waits for a real slice of Pizza and soft ice cream and Kovi waits to show off to his Bubby and Zeidy that he can now walk.

Gutt voch.
Next post from Montreal.

This is cute... If you think otherwise, you're a pish!

Go Shua! Go Shua! Go Go - Go Shua!

Article on Shmais.com
Kol Hakavod!

2 last funny lines I read.

1 - My teacher is crosseyed... She can't control her pupils.

2 - Q: What do you get when you mix holy water with castor oil?
A: A religious movement!

3 in the morning.

I wrote a letter to someone on Thursday night (some might call it Friday morning).

I was tossing and turning and I could not sleep (Again a pun, intended for Zvi).
It was Thursday night and I was being bothered by the whole Shlichus situation and how challenging it can sometimes get...
I finally got out of bed. It was about 4am. I wrote a letter to the Rebbe and then to someone who I really admire and respect.
It was a very 'revealing' email. I wrote lots of things that I would never have done had it been earlier and I would have been more awake.

Anyways, on Friday, the guy calls me and tells me that he thinks that I should always write stuff at 4 in the morn'.

I love 4 in the morn'

One week! One week!

We're headed to Montreal in another week (Sunday).
I am so excited.
I will get to play hockey finally.
I will see green grass and not just desert.
I will have the freedom to eat Kosher easily.
I will see other Frum Jews (Probably one of the biggest excitements)

I am so excited about it (I think I already said this, but I don't care!).

Thought about a whole bunch of stuff this past Shabbos.

A random *'J of the W': "Don't sweat the petty stuff... and don't pet the sweaty stuff!!"

This community is awesome, with some insane issues.
Monday, Sonia is preparing the first Jewish Women's circle of Cabo session. The women are going to get together and learn how to bake Challah's with all the Kabbalistic stuff involved. She's doing incredible work with the preparations and I have a feeling that it's going to be a total hit.
Anyways, since the women are going to be coming on Monday anyways, that means that they don't need to show up for Shabbos. It's part of their "We only need to show up to Shul once a week and then we're good to go" crazy!
So this past Friday night was not a spectacular one. We had about 20 people... 7 of whom were Jewish. I don't dislike the gentiles heaven forbid.
I do dislike the fact that they happily come into our home, taking advantage of our welcoming policy and and with a smile on their face, they chow down our imported and rationed Kosher meat. They don't even leave a penny in the box (Well, maybe some of them do... But the ones that I'm bothered with don't!).
This past week we had a family return. They are totally non-Jewish (again, no racial refferences intended)... When I say non-Jewish, I mean NADA... not even his father's paternal grandfather was remotely Jewish. But - in his words - he "Likes the religion and Jewish faith", so he shows up now every week and eats our expensive food without leaving a penny. Oh yes! Several weeks ago, he came on Friday night and presented us with a Kosher bottle of wine. How nice!!!
I need to do something about this exploitation. I somehow need him to stop coming anymore.

We had 9 Men (including myself). Only 7 were Jewish (including myself).
We had 4 women (Including Sony). Only 1 was Jewish (Sony).
We had about 5 kids (including Kovi). Only 1 was Jewish (Kovi).

This is our story. It's Friday nights like these where I think of just packing up and looking for another 'zone'... Dunno'! It's depressing to say the least.

But in some lighter news, I was waiting at a red light on Friday and some dude came up to me asking me for some charity change.
I didn't have anything. But then he looks at me, and asks: "Hey! Are you a you?"
"I'm sorry" I asked him.
"Are you a you?"
"I don't quite understand" I softly told him.
"Are you you'ish" He asked. This time a bit louder and slower.
"Oh!! Jewish!! Yes sir. I'm am" I told him.

It was cute. Only in Mexico.

We were discussing what part of Crown Heights we miss most. I told Sonia that I miss the corner of Eastern Parkway and the Dreidel the most of Crown Heights.
I just want to stand on the island and watch the hundreds of Lubavichers milling about, doing their 'own' thing. It's so amazing.
Sonia said that she doesn't miss anything about CH. Pshh!!

I was tyring to convince myself that I also miss chicken avocado wraps from Mendy's. But I don't think I was successful at that. I think they're cool. But I don't really miss them so much.

And finally, here's this past weeks email that I sent out to our mailing list. I thought it was a cool article.

Shalom a todos,
When we look at the world around us lately, it seems as if the entire earth is a political, emotional bubbling volcano just about ready to explode. We slowly feel the heat and the tension increasing with each passing day. Somewhere in our conscience, we know that something big - huge! - is about to happen. We just don't seem to know exactly when this explosion is taking place. Is G-d with us in our trouble?
The world seems to define and associate goodness and blessing with G-d, while viewing tragedies and negativity as the lack of G-d's presence.
This past week, a truly tragic event unfolded, with the mysterious disappearance of the Air France flight 447 en route from Brazil to France. Over 200 people lost their lives and the entire world was shaken by the mystery and the unfortunate tragedy.
Though I am not going to even attempt to excuse or justify G-d for this horrible catastrophe that occurred. I would like to point out the incredible guiding hand and 'divine providence' which shines through this, although in a very sad way. It shows us that even the worst disasters that may heaven forbid come upon our world, they are all within the carefully guiding hand of G-d.
Just this morning, I read about a French woman who was in Brazil and for some 'odd reason' missed her flight to France. She was supposed to be on Flight 447, which would have meant her certain death. But due to her running late, her life was spared. "What a miracle!" - "How beautiful" I thought to myself... My surge of happiness turned to utter shock when I read the next part of the news article.
Just yesterday, the woman was killed in a car accident. Her husband is injured and in the hospital.
When reading that, my initial reaction was shock and anger. "How could G-d have allowed a woman who went through so much emotional trauma all of a sudden get killed? And in the same week no less!"
"If she needed to die anyway for whatever reason G-d had in mind, and someone should have been saved, then why was she the one saved? It should have been someone who would have lived out a full and happy life!!"
...
But thinking over this story, we see a truly amazing revelation. G-d has shown us here, that he is indeed actively involved in tragedy as he is with blessing. Would you consider such a thing mere coincidence? G-d must have figured that it was necessary to keep this woman alive for just a few more days. Perhaps there was just some small little job remaining for her to do in order to fulfill her mission in life. This proves that G-d has a detailed involvement even when it comes to the negative. Bad things in the world are not the lack of G-d's presence, but rather, it's another - perhaps less appreciated - manifestation of his watchful management of this world.

This week in Israel, there was another sad story of a woman who threw away an old mattress belonging to her mother, only to later on discover that inside the mattress, her mother had hidden away her entire life savings of over one million dollars. After much stress and chaos, the woman realized that there was not much chance of getting the money back, she declared to the global media coverage "We must thank G-d for the good, as well as the bad!"
This globally publicized quote from the woman stands as a proud and very committed proclamation of a well minded believer in G-d. The woman is definitely someone with whom the Jewish people can take much pride from.
G-d is with us when times are good. G-d is also with us when times are tough. Not only is he with us when the going gets rough. But he is actually in the drivers seat, guiding us through the bumps on the road, ensuring that when it's all over, we will be better people and the world at large will be a better place. We may not understand his ways. We may challenge and cry out to him when pain and suffering eat away at our society. But that musn't change the belief and knowledge that he knows what's really best for us and is a G-d of absolute goodness.
So while we wait for that global volcano to erupt, let's hope that the explosion is one of goodness, peace and love of our fellow.


Shabbat Shalom to all.

Benny

In case you need proof that G-d has his plans.

Incredible Hashgocho Protis. Not a good ending. But open plan to the world right here

World's greatest 'Tatty in law'...

... And what a voice!!!

One last video before I leave.
This gives inspiration to anyone. Habs fans and other Human creatures alike.

Quick update on this past Shabbat.

So, Sunday we set off for Los Barriles, Baja California Sur. About one and a hlaf hours north from Cabo.
The place was absolute gorgeous'ness.
Sunday morning we arrived and chilled in the city the whole day. At night I made a barbecue for supper. We had fat, juicy steaks which we had brought from Cabo. Delicious.
Monday morning, I woke up at 6am and watched the sunrise on the ocean... It had my eyes (Get it Zvi??)
We chilled, went to town and looked around some more. Went to the beach and chilled some more, came home and chilled pocito mas and then went Shluff.
There is nothing like Chilling!!
The beaches over there are unbelievable! They are soft, sandy, rich and calm, and they are also deserted. Nobody around us for miles. We were there for about 2 hours and maybe three people passed by on ATV's and pickups.
There was some other dude all the way in the distance with like 7 dogs. But not another soul in sight. It was so amazing. The water was also the best Sea water I've ever swam in. An extremely memorable time we had.

Just a story I'd like to mention about our vacation.
As several people commented on the blog, they predicted that I would meet a bunch of Yidden in the city and I would make them Frum overnight and it would be an incredible Hashgocho Protis story for next week's Kfar Chabad or Beis Moshiach magazine and it would be Sholom Al Yisroel.
Well, it wasn't so. We spent most of the time secluded and to ourselves. It was a vacation after all. I know! I know! You're thinking "Feh! Shluchim NEVER have vacations!!".
Perhaps.
But that's not part of the story now, is it?
So anyways, we finish our trip, pack up the car on Tuesday morning and begin heading back to Cabo.
In order to get back to the highway with the normal 'paved' roads, I would have to take a road all around the entire city to the highway. It would take double as long and serve as a huge detour/
So I geniusly decided to take a shortcut. I would turn onto some unpaved road on the way and it should Lecheoireh take me straight to the highway, which would save time on our trip.
I took some turn and drove. We were on some rocky, bumpy, unpaved road in the middle of Mexicoville. There were clothelines all over the place. Stray dogs running about. Basically, it was as Mexican as it gets.
While we were driving, we see some sort of Cemetary coming up. It had a huge Tzeilem on the gate and a bunch of gentile graves. I didn't pay much attention to it while I was skimming over rocks and what not. But Sonia noticed that one of the graves at the end of the cemetary had a Magel David on it.
She convinced me to stop and have a look. After all, "This may be the reason why Hashem made us take this road!"
I stopped and snuck through the barb wire fence and slowly guided my way to the end of the graveyard, where I took a picture of the grave.
It's the top picture of this post.
The name was Allan Gordon, most definitely an American Jew, who apparently lived in Los Barriles (There are lots of American retirees who live there).
But he died almost three years ago and is buried among all these Goyim.
Needless to say, it was a very inspiring Hashgocho Protis moment.
I have the picture and have already begun working on researching who this guy is, if his family in Los Barriles is Jewish, if there are any other Jews in the city and other stuff that might help bring some Yidden back to Yiddishkeit. Who knows where this will lead.
I looked it up. His Yahrtzeit is 5 Teves, 5767. IY"H, I plan on travelling to the graveyard on Hei Teves this year and saying a chapter of Tehilim for his Neshama. Who knows??

All this, because I decided to take a shortcut through some random Los Barriles town road. Crazy!

...

To end off... Here are some thoughts that have been roaming through my head.

1. What does it sound like, when sheep panic? (My brother in law Shua says that it sounds the same, only with exclamation marks at the end of it)
2.When we were in Los barriles, our neighbors warned us to cover our garbage well and to lock our driveway gate at night. "If you're not careful, then the goats and cows will get in. They'll ruin your yard and eat from your garbage" they told us.
I was intrigued at this interesting way of life. When I grew up, the squirrels and racoons might claw their way through your trash. Here in Mexico, the people are worried about COWS rummaging through their leftover tuna cans and stuff. Really weird.

And that's my story. But on to better things now. Sleep.

P.S. This morning I made a Hachloto that I am from now on going to go to bed at 10:30 every night.
It's currently 10:57 and I still need to Davven Maariv.

Nighty night!

Tzveiteh aniversary!

Yes, this past Friday was our second wedding anniversary.
It's not normal how quickly time flies. Just yesterday, I was standing under the Chuppah, embracing a whole new life ahead of me.
I was less aware of the consequences of the commitment then. But I'm still just as delighted and un-regretful of that day.
Explanation:
When I first proposed, I had no idea of the trials that life would throw at me. I did not concretely know how capable 'life' is able to challenge a person. The one thing I did know, is that whatever comes my way, I want to be standing next to a special 'someone' to hold on to, being able to weather the storm together. There was nobody else in the world that mattered. Mazel Tov!
To be honest, at that moment I only saw glowy years ahead. Hardships and stressful times weren't feasible next to my 'then' Kallah and fresh wife. If I remember correctly, the cloud that we were living on was 'number nine!!!'
But then life threw a couple of curveballs.

• Moving apartments is pretty stressful.
  
• Having a baby is an extreme emotional strain (though worth every second of it - That coming from the mans point of view).
  
• Preparing for camp, when you're only hired a month beforehand is quite a challenge
• Being homeless and jobless for two and a half weeks was hell!
  
• Actually taking responsibility and standing up for things that I would have never done when I was a Bochur is difficult. But it needed to be done.
• Finding and securing our Shlichus was tough.
• The move, the settling and now, learning how to deal 'proffesionally' with issues that I've never ever been through before is very hard.

See, like I said before: While I was standing under the Chuppah 2 years ago, I had no idea and thank G-d didn't anticipate these trying times that life would bring us.
Thinking back, if I would have made one tiny little decision and not popped the question that night... perhaps I would still be single. If I were still to be single, no doubt I would be living a dreamy life. I would not have any of these potholes to overcome. I would probably be in some basement in CH learning in 770, or working for some minimal paying job, but paying my bills and enjoying my life.
But I made the choice! I asked someone to marry me and here I am. We've weathered some tough stormy times together and I couldn't be happier.
There is not a day of life since, where I don't thank the Aibishter for bringing me my Bashert and changing my life so dramatically.

It's worth the leap.

Metchembadir!

...

Tomorrow, we head off to Los Barilles on the East Cape of the Baja California. It's about 2 hours north of Cabo (the only direction we can possibly go) and it's supposed to be secluded and beautiful.
We rent a home for 2 nights there and celebrate the anniversary. Tuesday morning I'll be back and in the swing of things, with a Bar Mitzvah lesson and a Tanya class.

Shavua Tov. I'm headed to sleep because tomorrow I need to be up bright and early.

Pictures of our vacation to be posted when we return.

Shavuot update and stuph!

The fish market. Pelicans walk about waiting for the peasant fish mongers to throw them a fin or some unusable intestines. They literally are 6 inches from you. It's freeky!

We went to the fish market on Erev Shavuos. This was my first time there. It's right off the sea and the fish comes straight from the water to this little 'unknown' corner of the harbor. Every kind of disgusting fish is there and they're all fresh! (The white in between these two squids, is a loose eyeball. I didn't see it. The goils did and they screamed!!)

Kovi Lovi blovi stovi!! I love this little kootch!

By mistake we left a pepper in the sun. It reminds me of Rabbi Yochana Ben Zakai who grew old when he was still young... This pepper was in the sun only for several hours and he looked like he was rotten for weeks.

This past Shavuos was actually the first time I experienced Mesiras Nefesh for Shlichus. Not in any Chassidic, devoted, Ibergegeben type of way. More of a 'psychological', 'stressful' manner.

You see, this is the first time that living abroad took a toll on us. It got us pulling our hair out thinking "Why the heck did we ever choose to live in this insane place?!!"

Let's start from the beginning:

About a week and a half ago: I walk outside to our car parked casually in our driveway and I see some weird handwritten receipt on the windshield. I take it off and scan it. It seems to be some sort of electricity bill for the past two months. It comes out roughly to $500US. I am shocked and also puzzled as to the authenticity of the bill. It's not the usual green, printed bills that we should be receiving. I've never seen this before, it's in Spanish and it's written by hand.

Summing up all those problems, I conclude that this is either a fake, falsified bill from people who are trying to steal our money. Or it could be some sort of preparation for the 'official' bill which will arrive in the mail sometime soon. I put it in the glove compartment and drive off.

Wednesday evening: We pick up Sonia's sister who came to stay with us for Shavuos. She's come from New York laden with all the Goodies any Shliach in a foreign land can dream of. Cream cheese! Yoghurts! Bissli and pretzels!! But best of all, she's come with two tubs of yummy, delicious ice cream. Obviously making the trip from New York, the ice cream is pretty much melted. But we zip home from the airport and I throw the ice creams into the freezer. They should be fully frozen for Friday afternoon, when we have a Shavuos ice cream party!!

I get a phone call. It's from one of the people who live here in Cabo. The husband's mom is sick in Israel and the whole family needs to go be by her bedside. They are leaving tomorrow (Thursday morning) at 10am to the airport. It's late. So I promise them that I will come over to their house before they depart for the airport and I will wish them well, bless them and say goodbye.

Thursday morning: I wake up real early. It's a busy day. I need to do lots of shopping for Sonia. She needs to prepare for the holiday at night. She needs to make several cheese cakes, Challah's and work on the meals.

I go out and get some of the things that are on the shopping list.

When I get home, I find out the worst news ever!!! There is no electricity in the house. We have over $1000US of meat outside in the freezer. My white shirts are outside in the washing machine. I have no white shirts for Yomtov and worst of all, the ice cream is in the freezer.

I figure that it might just be some random power outage which will be fixed in no time at all. Just in case, I decide to go on over to the electric company office, to see if they can quickly turn it on.

When I get there, I find out that our electricity had intentionally been turned off, because we were a week and a half late on our electric bill payment.

I race home. We need to put together $500US to pay the bill. Somehow, with absolute miracles I am able to squeeze the money together (Thank you random euros and Lazer for the Maaser) and I race over to the place and pay the bill.

When I pay, I tell the clerk that we desperately need electricity asap. We have lots of meat bla bla bla.

She tells me that no later than 5pm it will be up and running.

I am sad that we may not have electricity until 5pm. After that, there's only 2 1/2 hours to Yomtov. Sonia will have to cook overtime during those last hours... But at least I'm relieved that we will have electricity!

I go home and tell everyone that we just need to wait.

Meanwhile, I wasn't able to visit this family travelling to Israel that they are already at the airport. I'm stressed.

We pile into the car and go shopping.

We get home. No electricity.

We wait. Still no electricity.

At 4:30, I'm a little nervous. I head on over to the office to see where the electrician is holding. When I get there, the tellers are closed. There is nobody to speak to, but a small phone which connects to the operator sits in the corner of the entrance room.
I pick up the phone and speak to the operator. I tell him my problem and after doing his research into it, he calms me by telling me that the electrician is already on his rounds and he should turn on our power within the next hour or so.

I am sort of relaxed, knowing now that we will have electricity for Yomtov.

Sonia will have to bake the cheesecakes real quick as soon as the power goes on.

But as luck would have it, that was not to be either.

6:50 I'm getting nervous. I head back to the office and ask them where they're holding with our house. The guy says that everyone's already gone home and they workers will be at the house first thing in the morning!! Screaming at him yeilded no results. My Spanish is horrible and I guess there really isn't anything he can do.

I returned home sad and depressed. Erev Yom Tov had been a failure. We have one operating gas oven. So Sonia made the immediate Yomtov food and Challah's in that small oven. But our Milk oven is electric.

Our ice cream was melting, so we asked the cleaning lady to please take it home with her and freeze it. We would come over and pick it up on Friday morning (She lives around the block from us).

People showed up for Minyan and the meal on Thursday night. It was such a horrible feeling, telling them that unfortunately we wouldn't be able to give them the comfort and enjoyable atmosphere that we were usually capable of providing them.

The house was hot.

The house was dark. We lit candles and celebrated our first night of Shavuos in the dimly lit room. It was romantic, but not ideal at all.

I stayed up until about 1:30am, learning by candle light.

Friday morning: I woke up, quickly checked the freezer outside and was surprised to find the meat still frozen solid.

At about 9:45am, the electrician came and turned on our power. We were ecstatic. Sonia baked the cheese cakes in the gas oven (double covered and all). The party was real nice, though the ice cream was pretty much melted. The atmosphere was wonderful.

But we are left asking why?! Why in the world did we need to go through that at just the wrong time!!