I finally have a life!

Our play in Hong Kong last year. IN the background in the Bank of China building. Yes, that's because we did the play in THE FREEKING CENTER OF THE CITY! IN FRONT OF LIKE 400 JEWS AND 800 PHILIPINO'S"!! It was on a Sunday (for those of you who were ever in Central HK on a Sunday.)

I'm self confirming my right to live. I've finally found my reason to wake up in the mornings. It's only going to last me another month. But until Chanukah I'm dead-out busy doing "something", working hard at it and barely getting any sleep over it. Yes, for the third time since the first time (Gosh!), we will be having our annual travelling Chanukah play. Two years ago, the play was created in Montreal in some dinky old basement at like three in the morning. We travelled throughout Montreal city over the first five days of Chanukah, performing our play in front of Chanukah parties, Schools and Old age homes (The old age homes were the funnestest). Last year, the play was done both in Hong Kong and in New York. This year, it's being taken to an entirely new level. First of all, it will be played in Toronto, possibly New York again, in the Tzivos Hashem Children's Museum. But, most impiortantly... This is my most exciting part... We will be doing our shown IY"H KA"H BLA"H in the state of Florida!!! Exciting as it may sound, The plan is to make a huge road trip with 10 Bochurim. We're going to rent 2 vans, drive down to Florida (Rabbi Berger is even letting us get our Chanukah break early) and perform in front of Schools, old age homes and Chabad House Chanukah parties (I think I mentioned that stuff already) over a two week period. It's going to be huge. I'm rewriting some of the script, we're adding in a new rap and best of all, We have the most all star cast ever to be assembled. Like I once mentioned, Ottawa is packed with talent. Bochurim that didn't do well in the mainstream Yeshiva system come here. Most of those Bochurim are extremely talented in many different forms. Many of them are extremely musical. Many of them are intense and phenominal actors. Many of them have extraordinary capabilities. But most of all, they have the Chayus in them to inspire! I hope. Florida is going to be trembling when Yam steps foot into the Sunshine state. ALERT THE METEOROLOGISTS!!! Hurricane Vince is comin' in!

Man I'm so pumped!

An innocent little fly!

Steve at the scene of my heroism. If you look closely, I think you can see the smile on his face, thanking me for saving his life. If only he knew what was coming to him. 'SOB'

I love the fly! May he Rest In Piece

Today, sadness of sadnesses occured. I came back from Yeshiva and went to eat lunch as usual. But while I was pouring my cup of peach juice, I noticed a poor little fly that was trapped inside my cup. It was such a sad sight to my eyes watching the poor little insect squiggle and squirm trying to release itself. My compassion got the better of me and I lovingly let it out of the cup onto dry tableground with the assistance of my trusty plastic fork 'Steve' (I can always count on my trusty plastic fork Steve. He has thus far never let me down!).
I took several photographs of the scene. But later, when I came back into the dining room and began boasting of my heroic move, I ever so dissapointingly found out that Avraham Meshulovin had seen this little crippled fly trying to hop around the table and had squished the creature in a most disturbing and gruesome a manner. I felt like taking Steve and driving it through Avraham Meshulovin's kneecaps (I don't know why, but sometimes I get these funny ideas. I think Steve may be a bad influence on me at times.)
But I held myself back.
I don't know why there's so much evil on this world! WHY DO THE FLY'S HAVE TO SUFFER SO!! MY WHOLE DAY WAS RUINED. I'LL BET MESHULOVIN DIDN'T HAVE TO BREAK THE NEWS TO THE FLY'S FAMILY. CAUSE HE COULDN'T GIVE A DAMN!!!

(I'm very tired.)

Last yea s Ottawa video!!

Here is the preview of last years Yeshiva Ateres Menachem central video. It's fleeking awesome!

Click here for the video. Again, you need to scroll down to the bottom of the page, click on the free button, then wait for the download link to appear and then enjoy this awesome video.

Klippah removal

Don't even try to figure out what this used to be.


Just a couple of hours ago, one of the Bochurim, with slight pressure from a very devoted Shliach of our Yeshiva decided to publicly burn his "Nisht Chassidishe" magazine which he was hiding. We had a whole proccession in the front of our dorm, where we mercilessly cremated the Tumah and Goyishkeit that was lingering in out midst. The burning at the stake was done with great rejoicing and celebration by all the Bochurim.
Here are some pictures of the event. Unfortunely, circumstances don't allow me to post any more graphic scenes than these... Sorry folks!

More pictures

Maggid Shiur/Hockey coach Rabbi Dovid Small and (behind the cup) Maggid Shiur Berel Zaklikovsky.

Van filling up in the morning.

Pictorial update

OMG!!!! THAT'S MY ROSH YESHIVA!!

Mashpia Shneur Hayes together with the Rosh HaYeshiva! JUDAISM!!!

This past Friday, about an hour before Shabbos, we can be found in some room, just chilling out, Bull-shoving and... Shmoking!

The snow storm this past week! why, WHY!!!!

Shabbos Mevorchim Kislev!

Well, I'm back in Ottawa Canada. The second to coldest capital in the world behind Iceland's capital city. Most of the Bochurim are totally convinced that I was not in Montreal the past few days. For some odd reason they seem to believe that I flew down to New York and went to restaurants and various hotel lobbies with some certain individuals. I don't know what's gotten into them.
Here are my Shabbos highlights:
1) Our Friday night meal was in Zal, due to a Bar Mitzvah happening in the neighboring room where we usually eat.
2) Friday night I fell asleep at 2am in someones room. Woke up 9am at the Vekking.
3) Started Tehillim at 10am. Didn't finish until about 2pm, thanks to Krias Hatorah and all the other disturbances. The Yeshiva ate at the Bar Mitzvah DAY meal.
4) I got an Aliyah at the Torah and, when I finished the final Brocha, I was bombarded with taffy's and hard candies. I'm still not sure why I'm getting all this abuse!!

Gutt Voch. A week and a day to my brother's wedding. I'm posting some fat pictures taken in Yeshiva on Friday.

Never before seen footage!!!

Check out this link proudly posted by Yamamai on www.yamamai.blogspot.com.
Anyways, this is a video of our Yeshiva's local Mashpia Shneur Hayes (Who is by the way an awesome guy) playing one of the songs he decomposed long ago. It has since practicaly become the Yeshiva's anthem. Always being sung by wonderful Ottawa Yeshiva Bochurim at wonderful moments of our wonderful days.
You have to click on the "free" link at the bottom of the page, wait a while and then click on the download link that comes up on the bottom of the next page. It's really worth watching. I actually think I screw up the song at one point or other. Whatever. Gutt Voch!

http://rapidshare.de/files/8150421/schneurjamminghisown.MOV.html

Smashing Farbrengen!

Me and Shoch! My Rosh Yeshiva. If only he knew who the REAL Rosh yeshiva was... p.s. KIPPAH, *hint hint*!!!

The tables which were created by Ain Sof, only to be broken into two pieces by our historic Farbrengen. Shoch fell on them and we had a serious Shviras Hakeilim!!!

During the Farby... This is all Koidem Hatzimtzum!

After the Tzimtzum. It was awesome. Shoch had a Smashing night!!

Monday, after much depression and anger releas'age from me and my Chavrussah regarding the declining situation in this Yeshiva. I was almost on the verge of leaving this place and going to another normal program just like Shteef and Shmidt did! We decided that we were going to give it one last shot and speak to Berger about all the things that needed improvement. Together with our Rosh Yeshiva Harav Sholom Ber Shochat, we arranged for a Farbrengen with all the Bochur Shluchim that night. Then to have a meeting with the Hanholo on Tuesday night.

The Farbrengen started after Chassidus at night. Rabbi Berger and everyone left and we started the party. Thank G-d it was Shoch's birthday two days before. We had a reason to Farbreng. Things got serious. We drank, we complained, we drank, we inspired, we drank, we sang etc. etc.

The climax of the evening was when Shoch started chasing me around the tables in the back of Zal (All this happens when you're in Ottawa), I took off with Shoch in relative pursuit. He decided to take a shortcut over the tables, in trying to fulfill the lesson taught by the Heiligeh Rebbe Maharash "Lechatchilah Ariber." Though this time, I figure even the Rebbe Maharash would have agreed it was not a good idea. Shoch collapsed through one table, cutting it in half and sending himself to the floor. One table was not yet enough and losing his balance, with his remaining humongously muscular build crashing down on the table to the left, he broke the next table. All depressions were immediately vanquished. I was on the floor with laughter. It was later said that "He who didn't see the look on Shoch's face when he fell through the table, has never seen a look of terror and fright in his entire life."

A letter was written to Rabbi Berger letting him know about everything that happened. We bentched and finished our Farbrengen. We left the mess in Zal. So that the Bochurim of Ottawa (and some of the Hanholo members) should always know that Yeshivas Ateres Menachem Farbrengs Vi ess darf tzu zein!

Next day, when Shoch met Rabbi Berger. Rabbi Berger told him "I hear that last night you had a real smashing night."

Note: The meeting the next night was held with the whole of Hanholo as we had promised and things were Baruch Hashem settled. Ottawa 5766 is back in full and hectic swing!

Oh, I almost forgot!

By the way, this may be stupid to post, in case any Ottawa Bochurim are going to be reading this before I get back. But I can't hold it in any longer!
Half the yeshiva is under the impression that I'm out of town for... Uhum. *cough cough*. Well, you know. An ingrown toenail removal with my orthodontist. I.e. A Shidduch date. I actually even tried to make it as obvious as I can that it was a Shidduch date. I left to the bus station in my Shabbos clothes and told everyone that I just needed a break and I'll be home tommorrow night. That had the successful reverse effect. Bochurim were huggnig me goodbye and telling me good luck on my date etc... I obviously continued to try and hide it.
The plan is for me to come back tonight engaged, start handing out cigarettes in Za"l, then we'll just break out color war or something. Problem is, half the staff are convinced that I'm going out too. Ottawa is so one track minded!!! There's only one guy who knows exactly what's going on.
I'm so looking forward to tonight. It's only in Ottawa that you can do crazy things like that and I totally love it. It's so cool.

I'M HOME!!!!

So, tonight I finally decided after much thought and discussion (actually, I think a phone call home was all it took) that I'm going home for one day. I'm stressed out from Ottawa, I'm slowly choking from all the pressures of everything happening around me too fast. I made the decision to take a breath of fresh air and go home for a day and rest up a bit. Some minus 10 degree fresh air.
I got on the Greyhound bus at 10pm which, thank G-d took me straight to Montreal in 2 hours. Came home. Hung out with the clan for a bit and then retired to my real home, MY BLOG!! haha, jk. (Doesn't anyone get 1:30 in the morning humor??).
Well, who cares anyways? Tommorrow I'm going to be back in Ottawa with all the taiereh Nashamois!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!

Az a Mentch iz Oisgematert, fregt mehn nisht kein kashyois af fee ehr fihrt zich!

Crazy mood last night!

Two very dear students of our Yeshiva went crazy last night (in a good way obviously). The probable explanation for that display of "excitement" was due to the fact that it ws like 3 in themorning. But anyways, Itzik Tiffenbrun (CGI Montreal's night activity director for this past year) and Yaacov "Vince" Lefton (Yeka color war hall of famer this past year) decided to get into one extra large sweatshirt. Hell ensued. The pictures say it all...




Itzik took every liquid found in our room and lathered his hair with it. The blended potion consisted of shampoo, toothpaste, wet tea bags, antibacterial hand soap and facial creams. Our room was so noisy with the cacophony of laughter, that we had to be told by three different dorm boys to shut up! It was hillarious!

My parliament! My roommate took this picture on Mivtzoim this past week. MY GOVERNMENT IS HERE!


Rideaux (that's ree-doe) canal. In the winter, this freezes over and people skate to work over it. It's the longest skating rinkin the world! a Canadian's heaven!!

Pre Shabbos Bein Hashmoshos

In true Yeka tradition. I try to make a Bein hashmoshos every firday afternoon. This past Friday was no different. I came back from Mivtzoim and set up for our little "booze fest." After downing a half a cup of Mashkeh to inspire my Shabbos mode, I was casually told that I need to drive the van to Yeshiva for Shabbos. Needless to say, my ride was one exciting experience.

The sirts we're wearing are the ones I made with matching Yarlmukah's in China. We we're going to make this week "crazy Shabbos clothing week" for the Bochurim. But we decided to push it off to next week, so that the Hanholo can be prepared and properly braced for it.

Good Shabbos

A Parsha one liner!

I saw a beautiful line from Yanky Tauber's article on www.chabad.org. It's for this weeks Parsha, regarding the sacrificing of Yitzchak: "The whole point of Judaism is not to die for G-d, but to live for G-d. But unless you're prepared to quite literally die for G-d, you cannot truly live for G-d."

L'chaim! Good Shabbos.

Ben the Levite

Mazal Tov

A big Mazal Tov to my best buddy from HK Josh Seroussi, who's celebrating his Bar Mitzvah this coming Shabbat in Hong Kong.
Josh, Hatzlacha Rabbah and may you continue making your parents proud of you. I'll give you a call one of these days.

The Yeshiva's 15 passenger.

A wooden bench, a bus stop and an apartment.

... The bigger picture. Todays' snowfall from my bedroomwindow

Shlichus

Is Shlichus the most abused word in Lubavich nowadays for Bochurim? I'm of the opinion that it is. I think most Bochurim don't really realize it. But Shluchim around the globe are slowly beginning to take advantage of Bochurim who work for them by calling it Shlichus. A Shliach nowadays can get a Bochur to take out the garbage, by telling him that he's a Shliach of the Rebbe and that's what a Shliach has to do when he's Ibergegeben.
Bochurim nowadays see through Shluchim. A shliach who's really and truthfully given over to the Rebbe is generally respected by Bochurim. Some Shluchim just think that they can take advantage of Bochurim. They blame it all on Shlichus.

"You won't be getting any pay, but you're a Shliach and so you'll do it for the Rebbe."
"Oh, by the way, can you take care of the Bochurim and teach them while I go home for a few minutes. It's Shlichus! So you'll obvioulsy do it with total Bittul Tzum Rebben's an Inyan."
"Hey you, scratch my back!! do it for the rebbe."

Alright, I was kidding about the last one there. But, you get the point. These are the types of stuff that many Bochurim have to deal with, including myself.
We just have to feel some appreciation. That's all! I know it sounds selfish and egotistical. But if Shluchim started treating Bochurim with more gratitude and appreciation and would just look at how much Bochurim care to do the Rebbe's work and help out in every way they could. They would have less problems trying to find Bochurim, Much more respect would be given to the Shluchim themselves and I wouldn't be blogging this right now.

Wedding ideas.

Anyone have any original, crazy ideas to do at a wedding? Something that was never done before. I'm just wondering. I don't have any use for it and I'm not going to any weddings in the near future, I'm just wondering for theoretical use only (...Obviously). *cough cough*

Pictures of Ottawa.

The Ottawa Beinuni's on the ice before the game. I'm #98

Some of the guys from Yeshivah.

With our coach, Rabbi Dovid Small.

Toes, or lack thereof?

This is a picture of one of the Bochurim's toes. I was in a crazy mood tonight and had him pose for me. (though he's a really great guy.)

First official snowfall of Ottawa

The view from my bedroom window at lunchtime.



While France's fires slowly simmer to a quiet close. While California slowly inches away from North America (*Aybei*) to be swallowed by the pacific forever, Ottawa Ontario calmly rests in a layer of white powder which came down from the heavens this morning. Hashem has decided that it's finally time for Canada to go into it's annual six month long hybernation. It was cold today and it snowed, followed by rain and very crabby weather. I had to trudge through a quarter of a centimeter of snow to get to Yeshiva this morning. I AM CANADIAN!! But I'm just not in the mood of snow now. I want Hong Kong weather! I want Californian weather. I don't deserve this!!!! A quarter of a centimeter is not alot and not all that bad, but it's the start that gets me ticked. So I'm just going to lie in bed a whole day and listen to music.

At least hockey season is coming. We're going to play outdoor hockey like every night here.


"Was it Canada the was punished with snow, or was snow punished with Canada??!!"

Santa picture Kippah

However controversial this may seem. Erroneously, my tailor in China made these Yarlmukeh's for me. I took the whole package of Kippah's and only later noticed that this one was part of them all. But, as surprising as it may seem, I sold a whole bunch of them to Bochurim here in Ottawa. It's deliciously layered with little reindeer and star Santa's.

Like my brother always says: Come to Yeshiva Ottawa, where we HAVE medication!!"

Awesome one liner

My roommate came up with this one liner over Shabbos, and I flipped at it. It was such an awesome one. I feel the world should know about this. It goes like this: "I tried drowning my probelms in alcohol, and then I found out that they float!"

What to do?

Tonight I had a long talk with one of the Bochurim from this Yeshiva. During our "man to man" chat, he kinda' let me know that he has lots of anger and resentment against Judaism, Chassidishkeit and G-d in general. We spoke and spoke and spoke some more.
I'm basically wondering if anyone has any specific working method on how to inspire a Bochur, who was constantly made fun of as a child by both friends as well as adults and who has had a very traumatising childhood, which totally turned him off of Yiddishkeit. He doesn't care toeat treif, he doesn't care to break Shabbos. Basically, only one of the many who are learning in Ottawa. But I wish I could inspire him somehow to at least know where the truth is!

Any ideas??

The birthday present on Motzaei Shabbos.

Here is Rabbi Smith opening up his rather expensive birthday present.The Bochurim bought him a massive boom box. They spent like 300 bucks on it. It was funny, cause for Rabbi Berger's birthday which was like 2 weeks ago, the Bochurim didn't spend a penny on it.

But we had a fun night as usual. The Bochurim here are totally blown. I mean TOTALLY BLOWN!! We played some Buck Buck during Melaveh Malkah, some Bochurim brought this massive stereo to Zal and just started dancing to Jewish music, We played roller hockey tonight and for the first time, we got thrown out of the parking lot by the security guard on duty. We didn't leave in usual Ottawa Yeshiva style until two cop cars were called on the scene and told us to go. GO Y.A.M. GO!! Just while I was having a great game.

I'm playing ice hockey tommorrow night again. We have another "Beinuni's" practice. Though learning will be hapening in a major oifen. (Morgen vet zein Gohr Andersh)!! I'm also giving a test to my class of five, on Jewish History tommorrow morning.

Ummmmmm, nope! There's not much else to discuss at this current time, except, let everyone know that I'm going to sleep and will try to get some more pictures of our hockey games online for all to see. FOR ALL TO SEEEEE!!!!!! (Man I'm tired!)

P.s. green pill was in full effect tonight. There was lots and lots of cussing in Ottawa today .

Rabbi Smith's wonderful birthday present!

Rabbi Smith's birthday cake, of which I 'Gradeh' got to eat a flower from it. He turned 30 this past Wednsday. We had his borthday Farby on Thursday night... He's a good man!

Pre Shabbos update quicky!

Just returned from Mivtzoim. Played hockey last night and scored a hat trick. Had a blast. Pictures to be posted after Shabbos. Oh! we also bought Rabbi Smith a birthday present. Pictures to come of that as well.

In the meantime, Good Shabbos to all!

Best Snag video ever!!

If you thought the Shidduch video was good. In case you thought the guy from the Shidduch video was talented... You need to check out this video. It's unbelievable. I love it so much and it's extremely SNAGGY!!!

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7829107821746099309&q=lavon&pr=goog-sl

Nominated for next years "Snags greasy payos" of the year award.

Pocito mas fotografias que yo tenia

That should have Zvi embarrassed!

Roommate Bruce Tauber practicing somegood Kumzitz material!

This is the new Kippah collection. Many in stock and ready to sell!! ($6 each, or $5 each if more than 3 Kippahs)

A small pictorial update of the "happenings in Ottawa!"

Rabbi Berger is the principle of our Yeshiva. He really is a nice man in the mornings, contrary to many!




Singing away in the studio ("Sound of one hand", 613-299-7565)

4 hour drive

"WHAT HAVE I DONE?!"

Last night, one of the Bochurim comes up to me and tells me that his brother is stuck in a city in Ontario called natacee, or something like that. He was stuck there since Friday with 3 friends waiting for their car to get fixed. Apparently they were on a road trip and Hashgocho Hoelyoinah decided that they needed to be stuck for like 5 days in nowhereville. So, this Bochur and me got into the Rabbi's 'borrowed' van last night after roller hockey and we started out on our 2 hour journey to Natacee, where we gave the 4 Hasidic refugees Kosher food, drinks, Nosh and general things to keep them happy.
After that we drove back, finally arriving at Kirkwood and Carling at about 5:30am. I fell asleep almost immediately and woke up this morning to find out that I had missed my morning Chassidus Shiur and Rabbi Berger was apparently pi**ed about it.
I now have to scamper off to teach my wonderful class of five Jewish Teenagers some Jewish history and some Shulchan Aruch.



Lord, I pray that I not be influenced by the wrath and incredible anger which Rabbi Berger may violently impose upon me on this day. And may only love and tenderness be showered upon me along with all the bountiful blessings which have been given me in the past and until this present day. I beseach you to sustain all shame and embarrassment which may have been alotted to me through Rabbi Berger. As the great Chechnian Rebbelleh said "For I would rather a hundred years in the burning fires of pergatory, then one moment of suffering under this Rosh Yeshiva."


And let us say Amen.




As you can clearly see, I'm so trying toavoid Seder. But... here goes!!!

Studio recordage

So, yesterday my brother and me went to this recording studio to record three songs in accapella. It wasn't so professionaly done. We only spent 2 and a 1/2 hours doing it and we didn't prepare anything at all. We kinda' figured out which songs we were going to sing while we were on the way to the studio.
The three things I learned from my experience was: 1 - Studio recording is so much fun! 2 - practice before you record and 3 - don't go to a place that will charge you an arm and a leg.

Cheerio!

Jam sessions in Ottawa

Our musical jams totally rock!! Like I said, I'm crazy about guitar now.

The Rosh Yeshiva has a B-day farby

Happy Birthday to Rabbi Berger! I have no idea how old he's turning. But the white beard suggests he either is very old, or the Bochurim here are very bad.
Farbrengen was great, except that I've been sick like a dog in bed since then.
Zvi and his Chavrusah Gershon are coming into town tommorrow for a Smicha party. It's great. Rabbi Berger never gave Zvi and Gershon their Smicha cerificates. So they decided to make a whole party tommorrow and have Berger present them with their Smicha. It's kinda' forcing the Rabbi to get them their certificates!

Still haven't driven the Yeshiva van.

OPERATION LICENSE: SUCCESSFUL

Whoever was praying for my successful pass'age of my driving test - Thank you so much! Your prayers were answered and, miracle of miracles, I now hold a "legal" drivers license in my wallet. That means I can now legally get arrested for wreckless driving. This is so exciting. I'm back in Ottawa and I'm ready to begin this coming year.
OTTAWA ROX! We had goulash for supper (there's your proof).

Steve says hi!

Tehillim for... me!

Everyone is asked to kindly say a Kapittel Tehillim for me: Ben Zion ben Faigah HaLevi. I'm getting my driving test today in the dominantly french city of Quebec called Hull. It neighbors the English city of Ottawa, so straight from Hull I will be going to Ottawa for Smicha. I'm leaving there in about 20 minutes and I'll need all the prayers I can get. Haven't driven for over a year and here I am expecting to get my license.

My one liner for this post in: *I'D BETTER PASS THE DARN TEST!*

Shidduch music video. (Ughhhhhh)

This vieo definitely wins the "Snag greasy payos of the year" award! But, the end is funny (I though it would be appropriate with my brother getting married and all... lol) Watch it: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3558048916514295437&q=shidduch


Oh, and my one liner is: Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after!!