So... Long time no post!

... Ich bin doch a Shliach!

Since coming back to Cabo from the Kinus, I haven't had a moment to sit down and write out a summary of my incredibly inspiring trip to New York. However now, at 12:30am, while sitting here at the computer, I decide that enough is enough, I must write something!

***

While on the plane and in New York, I found myself overwhelmed at times with emotions and thoughts. I tried writing down some of the ideas that were swirling violently within my head-mush.

Here are some of them...

Flight to New York on Wednesday afternoon:

1 - Never go to the airport with socks that have holes in them. It is highly embarrassing passing through screening.

Before I left Cabo, I put on socks with large holes, advertising my unattractive big toe to the world. I thought "who cares? I'm only travelling!"... Well well well... Boy did I ever care.

After removing my foot from the Croc I was wearing, I tried to quickly and inconspicuously tuck my toe into the inner part of the sock, by scruntching the hole of the sock under my toes.

It looked horrible and made me limp through the security checkpoint.

What made it worse, was the the guy who passed in front of me was stopped for a pat down, so I needed to very awkwardly wait for the agent to finish checking him before being allowed through myself... It felt like forever.

2 - While In the airport in Phoenix, I also saw those full body X-ray scanners for the first time in my life. They are real intimidating.

3 - I also saw someone getting the full and embarrassing kind of body pat down. I laughed when I overheard someone quip "It's not a matter of if I'm going to get that kind of pat down. It's when!"

4 - One of the Stewards on my flight to NY was named Hugo... Nothing against people with the name Hugo. It's a wonderful name. But...

Once arriving in New York and visiting 770 and the Kinus:

5 - "Why can't I eat all the Chalav Yisrael yogurts, cheese danishes, donuts and fresh Kosher pancakes??!! Have I not been waiting for this moment for so long now?!!!... Oy! Airplane gas."

I.e. "Major bloat'ation!"

6 - My cheeks and mouth are sore from all the kissing of friends today... As bad as that may sound, it is also equally Chassidish!

7 - Walk into 770 on Thursday morning and I literally begin to black out. I almost fainted from simple excitement of seeing real LIFE again!!! I've waited so long for this moment and here it is. Standing with the Rebbe, my beloved Moshe Rabeinu, along with people who have "got it"... Why am I in Cabo again??

8 - I look around at all the amazing Shluchim encompassing me and allowing me to submerge and hide within their shade and protection... Amidst the mayhem, the following analogy comes to mind...

There was once a very simple man who lived at the edge of the forest. Although he loved his king very much, he never felt able to contribute anything significant to the great honor and splendor of his great country. He was neither strong or intelligent.

And so, he would quietly sit at home and mind his own business, allowing all the important, talented people to proudly fulfill the king's every request and desire.

But one fine day, he receives an envelope. It is large and looks royal. Behold, it is stamped with the seal of the King himself, inviting him to join the elite members of his royal guard!!

The simple man was stunned. "This must have been a grave mistake!!" he exclaimed. But after some thought, he decided that there was nothing to lose. Although he cannot possibly be of any significant service to the king, he'd love to be a part of the king's select and exclusive royal guard.

And so, with his 'erroneous' invitation in hand, he strolled into the recruiting offices and before he knew it, was a part of the most elite, decorated countrymen of his land... Serving his king with honor.

Thankfully, so many trained and experienced soldiers were together with him. They kept him protected and safe, although he himself could not do anything, because he felt unable to help.

Yet one day, all the Royal guardsmen line up inside the palace, where they will finally meet the king personally.

It is now that the simple man begins getting nervous. How will he ever be able to face the king. While he was outside, patrolling the streets, nobody could recognize that he was really a loser. But now, in front of the king, why it will be so obvious that he was a fraud all this time!!!

***

Back to my thoughts now: I am comparing myself to the above story. I am not a Shliach! How can I possibly be a Shliach of the Lubavicher Rebbe??????!!!! The Shluchim are literally giants and I am but a nothing.

And so I conclude that my Shlichus must have been some sort of glitch in the system. I am but a mistake... A very lucky mistake. So I will continue marching alongside these heroes.

But standing in 770, I am nervous. There is nothing hidden anymore in these 4 amos. This is where everything is spilled onto the table and my fraud is revealed for all... I am nervous.

... But then I continue with my dream story...

***

The simple soldier waits on line with his other members of the Royal guard, his heart pounding inside his chest... The king is approaching. Soon he will come face to face and everything will spill out.

The king comes over to him.

But what is this??...

The king is smiling and has his arms outstretched for an embrace!!

How absurd!!!

The king smiles at this man and says "You thought that the letter you received was a mistake. Well I assure you it wasn't. I carefully chose you to be a part of my elite group because I know how much you CAN contribute. You are able to change my country for the better and I wanted you to be granted the opportunity to do your wonderful work."

***

And back to my reality.

Indeed, as ludicrous and crazy at it may sound, that I - little old me - have been granted the most incredible Shlichus opportunity of a lifetime... Yet the truth is smiling right at me.

The Rebbe lovingly chose me, yes ME, to be a part of his army of Shluchim. I can change the world. I have infinite powers to do so... I must only connect to my Rebbe, the source of this infinite power... And the rest just comes.

But I can change the world.

And I will change the world!

Good night.